New to Deployment

[ANG.GF]

Hello Everyone! I'm a proud NG girlfriend facing our first deployment in July. I was in shock at first but have now come to the understanding that it will be just as important for me to do my part here while he is gone. I'm hoping that you can give me thoughts, ideas, and support to help with this new experience.

[ParalegalNCO1]

Ok sure. Here are a few steps that will help your relationship last through the deployment:

1. Don't cheat on him. I know, you would never do that. No girl has ever done that to their deployed military BF/Husband. Once you get that sentence out of your system my advice is still the same. Don't do it.

2. If you have access, don't spend his money. It is his, not yours.

3. While abiding by rule #1, don't post a bunch of facebook photos indicating you are out in bars/clubs and the like. It will just make his mind wander. (I know; he loves you and would never think that way....but still don't do it).

4. Decide now if you really think you can wait. Dear John letters are a pathetic way to break up. Do it respectfully if it must be done.

5. Don't get mad if he doesn't call for a while, write and so in. Sometimes you can, sometimes you can't, don't read into it.

6. If you manage to make it through the five steps above, that is great. Now you need to know when he gets back he may be different; YOU may be different also. Give it time. You will have to learn to know each other again for a little while.

7. And most importantly, don't lie about steps 1-5.

Good luck, I wish you the best.

[Wobbly Emu]

Step 8. Print this and post on your refrigerator!

[Mr_Loki]

Step 9. ???

Step 10. Profit

[Highwind]

My two cents? I think that the fact that you care enough to worry about your role in his deployment life is a good indicater that you two will survive the deployment and continue to enjoy each other. I strongly agree with the dear john bit. He will have enough stressing factors in his life without that being dropped on him. Commit to a course of action before he leaves. That said, kudos for being a good girlfriend and thinking this out.

[Mr_Loki]

My two cents? I think that the fact that you care enough to worry about your role in his deployment life is a good indicater that you two will survive the deployment and continue to enjoy each other.

Everyone is different... trust me 100% on this one, lol.

[SSG Schneider]

I hope it's working out for you two, approaching his July deployment date. This advice posted so far was beneficial between my wife and I when I deployed. I wanted to highlight the "people change" comment here, and reiterate it. I had to learn to love the person my wife, and even some friends, became when I was gone. She also had to relearn to love the person I became after I returned home.

It's a challenge, but it can be, and has been, done. Good Luck!