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Thread: Husband considering joining the Guard; I'm scared.

  1. #1

    Default Husband considering joining the Guard; I'm scared.

    My husband wants to join the Guard, mainly for the health benefits, but also for other reasons. I have a chronic disease and have no health insurance. So... he feels like this would be our way out. Anyways... even though I think the benefits are awesome, I still have that same nagging feeling. One day I feel like he should do it, and I'd be okay. But the next I day, I feel like I'm going to have a panic attack just thinking about it. I also suffer from bouts of depression and OCD and it scares me to death to think that I may go through that again, only with out him here to help me get through it. We have a really close relationship, and his emotional support means alot to me. We talked to a recruiter a couple weeks ago, and he said to expect him to be gone for about 5 months with basic and AIT. We also have 2 young children and I worry about raising them alone for that long. Also, we live in a SMALL town, with no jobs available. He refuses to look in any other city for employment, but HATES his current job. (I don't blame him, the company is awful). I'd appreciate any perspective I can get on this. We are back and forth with this decision, but need to figure out something soon.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Husband considering joining the Guard; I'm scared.

    Quote Originally Posted by Chris36 View Post
    Didn't you already post this question (and receive responses) last week?
    She did. However it was used to revive a 4.5 year old thread. I told her to go ahead and make a new one as it would go further that way.
    Former 11B/11C OEF Veteran
    IA and NJ Guard 2001-2009
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  3. #3
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    Default Re: Husband considering joining the Guard; I'm scared.

    It is a tough decision that even to this day I occasionally questions if it is something we should have done. Most days Im good and feel like it was the best decision we ever made. My husband has been gone for 12 months and has 4 months left till he his home for good. (17 weekends for those counting) He happens to have a VERY long AIT.

    Honestly, when I found out he would be gone for 62 weeks it really freaked me out. But last Wednesday was the 1 year mark and Its almost as if it flew by. Yes, there were days that I didn’t think I could do it any more and had break downs. But I found out what I really could do on my own. (My family now calls me the spider killer) Family and friends will be your biggest asset in helping to raise your kids. Your recruiter should have materials available for you if you need help, or he should be able to guide you in the right direction. Use your small town to your advantage. Im guessing almost everyone knows everyone else and that can provide you with relief when it comes to needing a babysitter etc. If you are religious contact your church and see if they have any programs you can get your kids into. The busier you keep them the faster the time will go. There are tons of programs to help NG families cope with the separation. Militaryonesource.com is an amazingly informational tool. Also Military Spouse Magazine has a lot of websites and information.

    You just have to take it day by day and some times hour by hour. My husband is my best friend and he is the one I look forward to talking to at the end of the day. When he was at BCT I wrote him every night. It was my way of telling him what I did and how my day was. Nothing was sugar coated. If I had a crappy day I told him. If it was a great day I didn’t hold that back either.

    If you have any questions… let me know
    My husbands wife is the Army and I am his mistress.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Husband considering joining the Guard; I'm scared.

    The most frightening thing in the world is the unknown. To make the Guard less frightening, learn more about it firsthand. Your husband's recruiter can put you in touch with other Guard wives in the local unit's Family Readiness Group. They've already lived through most of what worries you, and can answer your questions in a way that only they can. While they may not solve every problem you have, they can certainly reduce your anxiety level.
    MATTHEW A. RITCHIE
    Lieutenant Colonel, Virginia ARNG

    The answer to your question may already be here.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Husband considering joining the Guard; I'm scared.

    Quote Originally Posted by coriejeanirene View Post
    My husband wants to join the Guard, mainly for the health benefits, but also for other reasons. I have a chronic disease and have no health insurance. So... he feels like this would be our way out. Anyways... even though I think the benefits are awesome, I still have that same nagging feeling. One day I feel like he should do it, and I'd be okay. But the next I day, I feel like I'm going to have a panic attack just thinking about it. I also suffer from bouts of depression and OCD and it scares me to death to think that I may go through that again, only with out him here to help me get through it. We have a really close relationship, and his emotional support means alot to me. We talked to a recruiter a couple weeks ago, and he said to expect him to be gone for about 5 months with basic and AIT. We also have 2 young children and I worry about raising them alone for that long. Also, we live in a SMALL town, with no jobs available. He refuses to look in any other city for employment, but HATES his current job. (I don't blame him, the company is awful). I'd appreciate any perspective I can get on this. We are back and forth with this decision, but need to figure out something soon.
    What does your husband do for his civilian job? Depending on your health issues; perhaps going active-duty might be the best course of action. I personally have known soldiers that are serving on active duty based on the health problems of their spouse and/or children. Make sure he is fully educated on the benefits. With active service; there will be less to or no out-of-pocket.
    Served in Iraq, Afghanistan, Germany, Korea, Okinawa
    Active-duty Army 23 Yrs of Service

  6. #6

    Default Re: Husband considering joining the Guard; I'm scared.

    He currently does sheetrock, stucco, and plaster finishing. But the company he works for is just not very employee focused. So... anyways. I just don't know what other options we have. I thought that once they signed up, it was active duty. For 3 years anyways. The recruiter said that he would be part time until they had a job opening and then he could apply for that job and if hired, he would be full time. I seen that a lot of people posted about there AIT being several months. I'm confused. We weren't informed of that. The recruiter suggested he go into mechanics/maint. because then he could work right next to the house. How does the insurance work? Would he be able to get insurance for us right away? My sister's husband is in the Air Force, and she said we could get Tricare Prime and not have to pay anything. But how does that work? The recruiter said he pays less than $200 a month for his family.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Husband considering joining the Guard; I'm scared.

    Quote Originally Posted by SteveLord View Post
    She did. However it was used to revive a 4.5 year old thread. I told her to go ahead and make a new one as it would go further that way.
    Aah...good call.
    ''It is the love of country that has lighted and that keeps glowing the holy fire of patriotism.''

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
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    Indiana
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    Default Re: Husband considering joining the Guard; I'm scared.

    Once he signs up he is active duty for the National Guard. He would do the one weekend a month/ 2 weeks in the summer deal. I think what fmcityslicker ment was if he went full time Army and not NG.

    Depending on what MOS he gets depends on how long his AIT will be. My husbands is super long but he has friends that he went to BCT with that were already deployed to the sand box with in 6 weeks of leaving BCT. It just really depends on how long his AIT is. BCT is going to range about 10-11 weeks and AIT from there.

    As far as tri-care He will get you registered in DEERS and once you get your ID that will serve as your insurance card as well. I have Tricare prime but I do not live near a post so I have a co pay and have had to pay a small percentage of a few bills ( urgent care for a broken ankle) but my contribution is nothing like what it was with our old insurance.

    When he is at BCT and AIT you will be covered. When he joines his NH unit then I believe (guys correct me if I am wrong) you can pay to continue coverage with tri-care. I think its about $180 a month but that could have changes. It is still cheaper than civilian insurance.
    My husbands wife is the Army and I am his mistress.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Husband considering joining the Guard; I'm scared.

    Quote Originally Posted by coriejeanirene View Post
    He currently does sheetrock, stucco, and plaster finishing. But the company he works for is just not very employee focused. So... anyways. I just don't know what other options we have. I thought that once they signed up, it was active duty. For 3 years anyways. The recruiter said that he would be part time until they had a job opening and then he could apply for that job and if hired, he would be full time. I seen that a lot of people posted about there AIT being several months. I'm confused. We weren't informed of that. The recruiter suggested he go into mechanics/maint. because then he could work right next to the house. How does the insurance work? Would he be able to get insurance for us right away? My sister's husband is in the Air Force, and she said we could get Tricare Prime and not have to pay anything. But how does that work? The recruiter said he pays less than $200 a month for his family.
    Tricare Prime is for active duty members and Tricare Reserve Select is for the Reserves and National Guard.

    His "active duty" time will be when he attends basic combat training and his AIT. After that unless deployed or during his annual training; he is in part-time status.

    Yes, you can get good health benefits with the Tricare Reserve Select but if he is have employment/income issues as well; another alternative is to enter the active component. Just weigh your options on what is best for you and do not make a hasty decision. Especially when there is family involved.

    Good luck.
    Served in Iraq, Afghanistan, Germany, Korea, Okinawa
    Active-duty Army 23 Yrs of Service

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