So, today is officially 2 weeks since my husband left for BCT. Im having a really bad night. Ive had a headache all day. And my nerves are shot because i havent gotten the letter that my husband told me a week ago that he sent ( he was able to call BRIEFLY and then again when he officially got to BCT to let me know he got there from reception)....anyway, i feel like that because I havent gotten the letter and i havent sent anything TO HIM back yet, that hes going to think the worst.
My husband is the kind of person who thinks bad thoughts just so that if something bad happens hes not let down. Im sick to my stomach that because i havent gotten his letter and havent been able to send one back to him that hes going to think that I gave up on him and that is CLEARLY not the case. I love him SO much and Im SOO SOO worried that hes going to think somethings wrong. I told him when he called the second time that I hadnt gotten it which was a few days ago. I should have gotten it by now. And tomorrow is Good Friday which means no mail AGAIN.
I REALLY wish that his letter OR AT LEAST the packet they send to you from BCT Reception stating his address and whatnot would get here so that i CAN write to him my undying devoted love to him. Ive written him S-E-V-E-N letters since hes been gone but i cant send them because i dont have an address...Im having a freaking anxiety attack, my head hurts more then anything right now, i have bad hips and my left one is hurting something fierce, and im literally worried out of my mind that hes thinking since i havent written him that ive given up on us.
AND, im lonely beyond anything.....since I bought my canvas last night, ive painted S-E-V-E-N paintings and Im working on the eighth because it normally keeps my mind off things but tonight as i was painting all these thoughts kept hitting me.....Goddess help me i wish he would call me or i would get his letter or SOMETHING!!!!!!!!