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  • contracting at an SMP cadet

    I'm an 2nd year cadet at my university and I just came back from Basic and ait in september. I'm trying to get contracted as an SMP cadet. I currently have a 250 PT score and a 3.4 gpa.

    Now here's the issue. About a week ago I had a very, very rough break up with my ex girlfriend. She has had prior issues with depression and anxiety which have resurfaced after starting college this year. She just filed a police report against me for texting and calling her because she would not return my stuff. No charges were filed it was just a report.

    How big of an issue is this regarding contracting? I'm shooting to stay in the guard as an officer. my record was completely clean before this.

  • #2
    Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

    Originally posted by Jackal View Post
    I'm an 2nd year cadet at my university and I just came back from Basic and ait in september. I'm trying to get contracted as an SMP cadet. I currently have a 250 PT score and a 3.4 gpa.

    Now here's the issue. About a week ago I had a very, very rough break up with my ex girlfriend. She has had prior issues with depression and anxiety which have resurfaced after starting college this year. She just filed a police report against me for texting and calling her because she would not return my stuff. No charges were filed it was just a report.

    How big of an issue is this regarding contracting? I'm shooting to stay in the guard as an officer. my record was completely clean before this.
    I'm waiting for Paralegal to chime in.

    My best advice for you is to stay away from her and not attempt to contact her by yourself. It'll be less of a headache for you later on. If you must have contact with her in order to secure your property, perhaps an attorney would be a good idea.

    The best thing you can do for your career is simply stay out of trouble. Some things are just not worth jeopardizing your future.

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

      Originally posted by Jackal View Post
      I'm an 2nd year cadet at my university and I just came back from Basic and ait in september. I'm trying to get contracted as an SMP cadet. I currently have a 250 PT score and a 3.4 gpa.

      Now here's the issue. About a week ago I had a very, very rough break up with my ex girlfriend. She has had prior issues with depression and anxiety which have resurfaced after starting college this year. She just filed a police report against me for texting and calling her because she would not return my stuff. No charges were filed it was just a report.

      How big of an issue is this regarding contracting? I'm shooting to stay in the guard as an officer. my record was completely clean before this.
      Lawyer up and don't contact her until you've spoken to an attorney.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

        Avoid her at all costs, the last thing you need is for her to file some BS restraining order. Or even a legitimate restraining order.......... Stay far away from her.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

          Originally posted by Jackal View Post
          I'm an 2nd year cadet at my university and I just came back from Basic and ait in september. I'm trying to get contracted as an SMP cadet. I currently have a 250 PT score and a 3.4 gpa.

          Now here's the issue. About a week ago I had a very, very rough break up with my ex girlfriend. She has had prior issues with depression and anxiety which have resurfaced after starting college this year. She just filed a police report against me for texting and calling her because she would not return my stuff. No charges were filed it was just a report.

          How big of an issue is this regarding contracting? I'm shooting to stay in the guard as an officer. my record was completely clean before this.
          1. Cut off all contact right now. What she will do next is not the worth the hassel.

          2. If you really can't let your stuff go, get police assitance. See if they will escort you there to avoid further contact.

          3. Did I say to cut off contact yet?

          4. If she does file a restraining order, you will have a firearms ban. This is a civil ban AND IS NOT CRIMINAL. You will not be able to own, use or posses a personal firearm while the order is active. THERE IS AN EXCEPTION for carrying weapons "while in the service of the united states". If she gets a restraining order, (which the police probably told her to do) it WILL NOT prevent military service. (It can for a clearance though, see number 8).

          5. If you get convicted of violating said restraining order, you now will have a domestic violence CRIMINAL CONVICTION whether you were technically "violent" or not. Now you have a lautenberg amendmant issue and cannot carry a firearm, at all, no exceptions. Your military career will be over before it starts.

          6. If she files an order...GET AN ATTORNEY. I don't care how much it costs. You can fight a temporary restraining order fairly easy with good counsel. If you try to do it yourself and it turns into a permanent order, you will have a much bigger hurdle there.

          7. Did I say cut off contact yet?

          8. Be advised, that although a civil order will not prevent service, and isn't criminal, there is a question on the security clearance interview that asks "do you currently have an order of protection placed against you?". Answering yes will not automatically deny you a security clearance. It could possibly though. All officers have to have a clearance.

          9. Just so were clear, there doesn't need to be charges filed for her to get a protection order. It is a lower burden of proof, and the judge just needs a "poponderence of evidence" which is almost always her story alone.

          10. Whatever it was, let it go.
          Last edited by ParalegalNCO1; October 17th, 2012, 05:47 PM.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

            Originally posted by ParalegalNCO1 View Post
            1. Cut off all contact right now. What she will do next is not the worth the hassel.

            2. If you really can't let your stuff go, get police assitance. See if they will escort you there to avoid further contact.

            3. Did I say to cut off contact yet?

            4. If she does file a restraining order, you will have a firearms ban. This is a civil ban AND IS NOT CRIMINAL. You will not be able to own, use or posses a personal firearm while the order is active. THERE IS AN EXCEPTION for carrying weapons "while in the service of the united states". If she gets a restraining order, (which the police probably told her to do) it WILL NOT prevent military service. (It can for a clearance though, see number 8).

            5. If you get convicted of violating said restraining order, you now will have a domestic violence CRIMINAL CONVICTION whether you were technically "violent" or not. Now you have a lautenberg amendmant issue and cannot carry a firearm, at all, no exceptions. Your military career will be over before it starts.

            6. If she files an order...GET AN ATTORNEY. I don't care how much it costs. You can fight a temporary restraining order fairly easy with good counsel. If you try to do it yourself and it turns into a permanent order, you will have a much bigger hurdle there.

            7. Did I say cut off contact yet?

            8. Be advised, that although a civil order will not prevent service, and isn't criminal, there is a question on the security clearance interview that asks "do you currently have an order of protection placed against you?". Answering yes will not automatically deny you a security clearance. It could possibly though. All officers have to have a clearance.

            9. Just so were clear, there doesn't need to be charges filed for her to get a protection order. It is a lower burden of proof, and the judge just needs a "poponderence of evidence" which is almost always her story alone.

            10. Whatever it was, let it go.
            "Boom" *drops mic, exits stage left*

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

              Originally posted by collk22 View Post
              "Boom" *drops mic, exits stage left*

              update:


              Well I got a call from the campus PD on the day I posted this thread requesting that I come to the station to pick up my stuff. They told me that this wasn't a big issue, but she didn't want me contacting her anymore and that she filed a report about it, nothing else. I got the impression that these situations aren't all that uncommon

              I sat down with the officer like an adult, shook hands, and spilled the beans on what has been going on the past few weeks with her. I mentioned that she had prior issues in high school, a few years prior to us dating, and how they had been resurfacing in college along with certain "crazy thoughts" my ex had discussed with me. I also told the officer that in the last two weeks of our relationship I helped her formally apply for counseling here at the university. I'm certainly not an angel in this situation, but i'm still shocked she did this after two years of being together. And this all happened within a few days time too.

              Since nothing has happened do I still need to notify my ROTC and my guard unit of the situation?
              Last edited by Jackal; October 20th, 2012, 06:33 PM.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

                Originally posted by Jackal View Post
                Since nothing has happened do I still need to notify my ROTC and my guard unit of the situation?
                While that's not a formal requirement by law or regulation, I recommend that you do so.

                If you break the bad news first, then you're more in control of the situation. If nothing happens, then you still look mature, forthright, and honorable by voluntarily disclosing an awkward situation. If it does escalate somehow, your commander won't freak out and presume the worst, because you've already briefed him on the topic. You don't appear to be hiding anything, and thus he's willing to give you the benefit of the doubt. Act like a man of honor, and not a lawyer.

                Bad news gets worse with age, so get out in front of the story. As difficult as it is, it's potentially far, far worse to wait.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

                  Originally posted by Jackal View Post
                  update:


                  Well I got a call from the campus PD on the day I posted this thread requesting that I come to the station to pick up my stuff. They told me that this wasn't a big issue, but she didn't want me contacting her anymore and that she filed a report about it, nothing else. I got the impression that these situations aren't all that uncommon

                  I sat down with the officer like an adult, shook hands, and spilled the beans on what has been going on the past few weeks with her. I mentioned that she had prior issues in high school, a few years prior to us dating, and how they had been resurfacing in college along with certain "crazy thoughts" my ex had discussed with me. I also told the officer that in the last two weeks of our relationship I helped her formally apply for counseling here at the university. I'm certainly not an angel in this situation, but i'm still shocked she did this after two years of being together. And this all happened within a few days time too.

                  Since nothing has happened do I still need to notify my ROTC and my guard unit of the situation?
                  ?????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                  You think that is it??????

                  I should have been more clear in my post.

                  DO NOT SPEAK TO THE POLICE

                  You will regret what just happened. It is not over.

                  Cops do not "speak" to those that they wish to leave alone.
                  Last edited by ParalegalNCO1; October 21st, 2012, 09:38 AM.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

                    You just participated in a non custodial interview "like an adult".....aka "a suspect". They are going to go back to her and verify everything you just said....and she WILL have a different version.

                    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wXkI4t7nuc
                    Last edited by ParalegalNCO1; October 21st, 2012, 02:43 PM.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

                      I'm ready for the next update...

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

                        Originally posted by ParalegalNCO1 View Post
                        ?????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

                        Cops do not "speak" to those that they wish to leave alone.
                        I was the one who asked to talk with the officer not the other way around. They originally just wanted to give me my stuff back. I was concerned for my ex's health which I made apparent to them. And This all happened before I created this thread. I know what happens in these cases. The boyfriend gets profiled as a stalker. I didn't want that.
                        Last edited by Jackal; October 21st, 2012, 10:17 PM.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

                          If you get a no contact/restraining order or charges are filed, it will stop your career. It's in the AR that you're to be flagged pending the out come. Just went through this with one of my NCOs.

                          Agree with stop talking to her. It could look like stalking or harassment. If you didn't get all of your stuff back, too bad. Let it go, the police might do a civil standby but they won't get in the middle of an argument over who owns it. They will tell you to take it to civil court.

                          Talking with the police, if you were read your rights or asked to write a written statement, I maybe a little worried. They don't have to file charges right away.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: contracting at an SMP cadet

                            Originally posted by RedLeg View Post
                            If you get a no contact/restraining order or charges are filed, it will stop your career. It's in the AR that you're to be flagged pending the out come. Just went through this with one of my NCOs.

                            Agree with stop talking to her. It could look like stalking or harassment. If you didn't get all of your stuff back, too bad. Let it go, the police might do a civil standby but they won't get in the middle of an argument over who owns it. They will tell you to take it to civil court.

                            Talking with the police, if you were read your rights or asked to write a written statement, I maybe a little worried. They don't have to file charges right away.
                            There is only an issue if criminal charges are filed. There is no authority to flag someone soley on the basis of getting a restraining order/no contact order against them. There are unfortunatley many Soldiers that have them. There are also frequently many commanders that do not understand them, they are civil orders and not criminal. It cannot be the basis for separation (any underlying misconduct technically could be, but not off the basis of an order on its own). As I previously stated, it could have adverse outcomes on a security clearance. I also believe I have been through this topic with you in the past.
                            Last edited by ParalegalNCO1; October 22nd, 2012, 09:06 AM.

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