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  • Advice on talking to family.

    I am 30 years old with a stable career and am married with a 4 year old child. I have really been researching the National Guard and am considering joining. The problem I have is my wife is extremely opposed to this idea and I can not talk to her about it. I want to join for the experience of the training and some of the benefits I could receive. Is there anyway to get through to her or should I just forget the whole thing. Any advice or suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks

  • #2
    Re: Advice on talking to family.

    Take your family member with you to the recruiter.

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    • #3
      Re: Advice on talking to family.

      My wife was opposed to the idea at first, probably not as extreme as yours, but after 1 1/2 years of talking about it she is being supportive. She realizes that it's something that I've always wanted to do and we're at a time in our life where the benefits will be an added bonus. I've taken the asvab and will be going to meps in a few days to hopefully pass the physical and prepare to be sworn in. I'm married with an 8 and 6 year old and I'll be turning 34 next month.

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      • #4
        Re: Advice on talking to family.

        Has she articulated her objections, or is it pure emotion? You can't argue with emotion, and emotional people tend to get more hysterical if you confront them with facts. She may benefit from speaking with other National Guard wives. The most frightening thing in the world is the unknown, so the more she learns about the Guard and Guard life, the less emotional she will become. You may be able to talk her down to a point where you can have a rational conversation, and put her objections into a larger context. Ultimately, though, you've got to live with her, so consider the decision carefully.

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        • #5
          Re: Advice on talking to family.

          Be honest, when you talk to her. Research all that you can so you can answer her questions. Since this is a heated topic, you will want to keep a cool head and not answer back in ways to start a arguement. If you dont know the answer, thats fine, nobody knows everything. Just research and see what helps. As mentioned earlier, see if her issues are based off knowledge or emotion. You have to know the obstacle you are up against. Make sure its the decision both of you want, and feel good about. Neither side should cave just for the sake of it, or this situation will come up again down the road. Both of you talk to the recruiter together if you think it would help. Recruiters are used to issues like this, and cant help explain and give insight on topics or benefits, you might not have found. Good luck, we wish you the best in whatever the future brings to you and your family.

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          • #6
            Re: Advice on talking to family.

            Point out the Medical. My Father in-law retired a few years back and now that the Mother in-law turned 60, their medical premiums are a $1000 a month. He is 61. That is one issue I keep pointing out to the wife as I have been trying to go back to the guard. She is against the idea also.

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