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  • Changing units/MOS-a wife needs to know

    Hello,

    I am a wife of a Guardsmen and he has been in for 6 years or so after his active duty Army career. I thought maybe I owuld weigh in and help answer your question. When my husband first joined the guard he was an e4 and the demands were not too high, then there was a major flood in our state and his unit was sent for relief and he was gone for about a week (this was also literally right before or son was going to be born). About 7 months after that, they were deployed to Iraq and he was gone for one year. In that time, obviously our son was a baby and our daughter was 3. He missed a lot in that time period. When he was in Iraq he got his e5 and that's really when it became more than a one weekend/month, one week/year job. He also has a full time civilian job working for the government. about 6 months ago, he got his e6 and it's ridiculous. My opinion is that his unit is terribly unorganized and full of idiots, because he does so much that his e5's should do, but they tell him not to let them do it.

    Long story short, my experience is that before e6, everything was decent if there would have been no deployments or flood relief, it would have been no problem at all. Now that he's an e6, though it's a freaking joke and demands a lot more of his time than he is compensated for, demands a ton of stress and is honestly wearing on our marriage. Most of this is because he just misses out on so much, especially since we have kids. It's really ridiculous and I wish he could just quit.

    Hope this helps! Weigh the decision big time before making that call, as I'm sure you will.

  • #2
    Changing units/MOS-a wife needs to know

    Hi everyone,

    My husband is in the National Guard, and long story short I think that a unit change would be less stressful and be better for our family and our marriage. He got E6 about 6 months ago and since then, stuff has hit the fan, and he has to put so much extra time into it (stay later at drills, go earlier, extra work and time at home, training, etc etc) that we are having some issues. Basically, I have asked him what the options are for going into a different unit, as this unit has a big retention problem and he says he does a lot of babysitting and that's what takes up a lot of his time. They also try to "cram 20 pounds of crap into a 5 pound bag" (almost a direct quote) at each drill or AT and it's wearing him out big time. He says he cannot even approach the subject anytime soon, but want to change units and I believe him and trust what he's saying. I've read a few other forums and posts on here and have seen a lot of different suggestions for switching units/mos and I'm curious if anyone has any expertise in this field or any suggestions. I realize that once he lights that match and says he wants out, it could effect his career with this unit, so treading lightly may be advised, but are there any options or ways to make this less of a burden on our family? Does the family impact even matter in the world of the national guard, because my immediate thought is "no" but would that perhaps help the case? I know he willingly signed up, but holy cow things are not the way they could be in this unit according to many people in it, and not the way they used to be at all.

    Any and all advice is highly appreciated!

    Thanks!

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Changing units/MOS-a wife needs to know

      It might not be that much different at all because he is now a Staff Sergeant and the "extra time" is expected. All part of being a leader in the Guard. Might even be worse losing his experience and any kind of pull he might have at his current unit.
      Last edited by SteveLord; July 15th, 2013, 04:55 PM.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Changing units/MOS-a wife needs to know

        It would be nice for him to sign up and have him give his perspective on the matter. With any issue in the military, he should engage his change of command.

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: How "part-time" is the Guard in reality?

          Your responses do not pertain to everyone in the Guard/Reserves and this is why......

          Originally posted by bananapancakes View Post
          Hello,

          I am a wife of a Guardsmen and he has been in for 6 years or so after his active duty Army career. I thought maybe I would weigh in and help answer your question. When my husband first joined the guard he was an e4 and the demands were not too high, then there was a major flood in our state and his unit was sent for relief and he was gone for about a week (this was also literally right before or son was going to be born). About 7 months after that, they were deployed to Iraq

          (Iraq combat deployments ended in 2011 and Afghanistan will end next year. With the wars ramping down; the only things will be emergencies and humanitarian missions. That will take a lot out of the equation.)

          and he was gone for one year. In that time, obviously our son was a baby and our daughter was 3. He missed a lot in that time period. When he was in Iraq he got his e5 and that's really when it became more than a one weekend/month, one week/year job. He also has a full time civilian job working for the government

          (In my opinion, working for the government in a civilian capacity while in the Guard/Reserves provides a lot of flexibility. I think this is an excellent plus.)


          . about 6 months ago, he got his e6 and it's ridiculous. My opinion is that his unit is terribly unorganized and full of idiots, because he does so much that his e5's should do, but they tell him not to let them do it.

          (You are basically relaying the opinions of your spouse and there is no real truth behind it. Unless you were a SM, you do not know what goes on in his unit and every unit is run different.)


          Long story short, my experience is that before e6, everything was decent if there would have been no deployments or flood relief, it would have been no problem at all. Now that he's an e6, though it's a freaking joke and demands a lot more of his time than he is compensated for, demands a ton of stress and is honestly wearing on our marriage. Most of this is because he just misses out on so much, especially since we have kids. It's really ridiculous and I wish he could just quit.

          Hope this helps! Weigh the decision big time before making that call, as I'm sure you will.
          I had demands in both the NG/RA and currently have more demands in the active component that takes me away much longer than what is bananapancakes experiencing. There are hundreds of thousands of E5 and above leaders in the Reserves and National Guard that do not have these problems and are able to manage it.
          Last edited by SteveLord; July 15th, 2013, 06:17 PM. Reason: Downsized some text ;)

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: How "part-time" is the Guard in reality?

            This is a good article because it illustrates the amount of commitment required when you serve in the military; no matter if its full-time or part-time.

            http://spousebuzz.com/blog/2013/07/s...2887570&rank=4

            Newsflash: the military is not a convenient form of welfare. If you’re going to join up you’re going to have to serve stateside, downrange or wherever Uncle Sam sends you.

            Read more: http://spousebuzz.com/blog/2013/07/s...#ixzz2Z9RCTyma
            SpouseBUZZ.com

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: How "part-time" is the Guard in reality?

              (Moved banana's and Chief's posts from other thread. Let's keep the OP's personal experiences, gripes, concerns and questions here.)
              Last edited by SteveLord; July 15th, 2013, 06:18 PM.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: How "part-time" is the Guard in reality?

                There's so much about the initial post that fires me up..I'm going to have to try to keep this civil.

                Bottom line is that your husband, as a leader, is going to have to put in extra time if he wants his troops to perform at a satisfactory level. The national guard, contrary to popular belief, is not a one weekend a month, two weeks per year commitment. Regardless of whatever "issues" you perceive to be going on in the unit, even very well run units require a lot of time to be put in by leaders outside of drill.

                Comment

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